Have you ever heard someone begin with, “I don’t mean to speak ill, but this is just the truth”? Be careful — such prefatory phrases often open the door to a sin commonly underestimated: backbiting (ghibah).
In Islam, guarding one’s tongue is one of the keys to salvation in this world and the hereafter. But what exactly is ghibah? Why is ghibah forbidden by religion, even equated to eating the carcass of a human being, which is disgusting?
This article will thoroughly discuss the definition of ghibah (backbiting), present hadiths about ghibah in Arabic and their meanings, and analyze how to avoid the behavior of ghibah based on the in-depth explanation of Imam Al-Ghazali in his legendary book, Ihya’ ‘Ulumuddin.
What Does Ghibah Mean in Islam?
Many people mistakenly think that ghibah is the same as fitnah. They argue, “But I’m just stating facts!” However, it is precisely because it *is* a fact that it is considered ghibah.
The Definition of Ghibah (Backbiting) According to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ
The meaning of ghibah is talking about others regarding things they would dislike if they heard it. This definition is not a fabrication of scholars, but rather a direct saying from the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ.
In a sahih hadith narrated by Imam Muslim, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ asked his companions:
أَتَدْرُونَ مَا الْغِيبَةُ? قَالُوا: اللهُ وَرَسُولُهُ أَعْلَمُ, قَالَ: ذِكْرُكَ أَخَاكَ بِمَا يَكْرَهُ
“Do you know what backbiting is?” They replied: “Allah and His Messenger know best.” He said: “Mentioning your brother in a way that he would dislike.”
Then a companion asked, “What if what I say is actually in him?” He ﷺ answered:
إِنْ كَانَ فِيهِ مَا تَقُولُ, فَقَدِ اغْتَبْتَهُ, وَإِنْ لَمْ يَكُنْ فِيهِ فَقَدْ بَهَتَّهُ
“If what you say about him is true, then you have ghabattahu (backbitten him); if it is false, you have slandered him (buhtān)” (Sahih Muslim)
The Limits of Ghibah (Backbiting) According to Imam Al-Ghazali
Imam Al-Ghazali in Ihya’ ‘Ulumuddin clarifies this definition. He outlined the definition regarding the limits of ghibah:
اعْلَمْ أَنَّ حَدَّ الْغِيبَةِ أَنْ تَذْكُرَ أَخَاكَ بِمَا يَكْرَهُهُ لَوْ بَلَغَهُ
“Know that the limit of ghibah is when you mention about your brother (or sister) something that he/she would dislike if it reached his/her ears.”
Its scope is very broad, covering deficiencies in:
- Physical characteristics: Short, black, cross-eyed.
- Nasab: Lowly birth, uncouth origins.
- Akhlak: Stingy, arrogant, quick-tempered.
- Religion: Rarely prays, immoral/wicked.
- Worldly Matters: Eats a lot, sleeps a lot, has bad clothes.
So, what is meant by ghibah encompasses everything—from physical attributes to clothing—that if the person knew it, they would feel hurt.
Apa Perbedaan Antara Ghibah dan Buhtan serta Kritik?
Often we justify, “I am sharing this as criticism so that he becomes aware.” However, Imam Al-Ghazali gives a stern warning. The boundary between criticism (advice) and backbiting is very thin, as thin as the intention in the heart.
Here is the difference based on the explanation of Imam Al-Ghazali:
| Term | Explanation & Conditions | Legal Status |
| Ghibah | Telling about another person’s flaws that are factual behind their back with the intention of belittling or just casual gossip. | Haram (Major Sin) |
| Buhtan | Telling about another person’s bad qualities that are false/untrue. | Haram (Slander) |
| Advice (Criticism) | Conveying a brother’s mistakes directly to him with the intention of improvement, done privately and with affection. | Obligatory/Recommended |
The Conditions for Criticism to be Considered Advice (Not Backbiting) According to Al-Ghazali
In the book Ihya’ ‘Ulumuddin, Imam Al-Ghazali wrote a golden rule in reprimanding the mistakes of others so as not to fall into backbiting or the deception of the devil:
وَمَهْمَا عَرَفْتَ هَفْوَةَ مُسْلِمٍ بِحُجَّةٍ فَانْصَحْهُ فِي السِّرِّ
“And if you know of a Muslim stumbling (making a mistake) with clear proof, then advise him in secret.”
Al-Ghazali continues with a very profound psychological warning regarding the signs of sincere advice:
1. Not Feeling Happy to See His/Her Mistakes
Do not let Satan deceive you. If you rebuke someone, examine your own heart:
وَلَا تَعِظْهُ وَأَنْتَ مَسْرُورٌ بِاطِّلَاعِكَ عَلَى نَقْصِهِ لِيَنْظُرَ إِلَيْكَ بِعَيْنِ التَّعْظِيمِ وَتَنْظُرَ إِلَيْهِ بِعَيْنِ الِاسْتِحْقَارِ
“And do not advise him while you are pleased to know of his shortcomings, so that he may look at you with respect and you look at him with contempt.”
If there is a feeling of “satisfaction” or feeling “more pious” when criticizing, it is not advice, but arrogance that destroys.
2. Feeling Sadness (Empathy)
Islamic criticism arises from a sense of sadness, not a spirit of condemnation.
وَلْيَكُنْ قَصْدُكَ تَخْلِيصَهُ مِنَ الْإِثْمِ وَأَنْتَ حَزِينٌ كَمَا تَحْزَنُ عَلَى نَفْسِكَ
“Your intention should be to save him from sin, while feeling sad (because he commits the sin) as you would feel sad if that deficiency were in yourself.”
3. He Prefers to Change Without Our Intervention
This is the highest level of sincerity in criticism.
وَيَنْبَغِي أَنْ يَكُونَ تَرْكُهُ لِذَلِكَ مِنْ غَيْرِ نُصْحِكَ أَحَبَّ إِلَيْكَ مِنْ تَرْكِهِ بِالنَّصِيحَةِ
“And you should prefer that he abandon the error without your advice, than that he abandon it because of your advice.”
Meaning, if the person realizes their mistake on their own without us needing to reprimand them, we should be happier. If we “itch” to reprimand them just to be called a hero or a wise person, then that is desire, not da’wah (Islamic propagation).
Therefore, public (open) criticism on social media that is shaming, or criticism accompanied by a sense of superiority, according to Al-Ghazali is closer to satisfying one’s desires and backbiting than religious advice.
Evidence Regarding Backbiting: Quranic Verses and Hadith
The prohibition of backbiting is very strict in Islam. The Quran and Hadith use very visual and disgusting analogies for those who practice it.
Quranic Verses About Backbiting
Allah says in Surah Al-Hujurat, verse 12:
وَلَا يَغْتَب بَّعْضُكُم بَعْضًا ۚ أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ
“And do not spy on one another. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would detest it.”
Imam Al-Ghazali commented on this verse with a sharp statement:
وَلَا يَزَالُ الْمُنَاظِرُ مُثَابِرًا عَلَى أَكْلِ الْمَيْتَةِ
“And a disputer (with bad intentions) is always diligent in consuming the carcass (of his brother).”
Hadith About Backbiting: A Terrifying Tale of Two Fasting Women
There is a hadith about backbiting (ghibah) quoted by Al-Ghazali in Ihya’ that is very frightening regarding the effect of backbiting on the worship of fasting.
It is narrated that there were two women who fasted until they were almost dying of thirst. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ initially hesitated to allow them to break their fast, but eventually he said:
كَيْفَ تَصُومُ مَنْ ظَلَّ نَهَارَهُ يَأْكُلُ لَحْمَ النَّاسِ
“How can someone’s fast be considered valid when they spend the day eating the flesh of others?”
The Prophet ﷺ then commanded them to vomit the contents of their stomachs. Then something astonishing happened:
فَقَاءَتْ كُلُّ وَاحِدَةٍ مِنْهُمَا عَلَقَةً مِنْ دَمٍ
“Then emerged from each of them a clots of blood and flesh.”
Then the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
“By He in Whose Hand is my soul, if (the blood of backbiting) had remained in their bellies, the fire of Hell would have consumed them.”
This story shows that the sin of ghibah (backbiting) can nullify the reward of fasting in essence, even though the fast is valid according to Islamic jurisprudence (fiqh).
Examples of Ghibah (It’s Not Just Verbal!)
Often we think ghibah is just chatting. According to Al-Ghazali, ghibah can be done in many more subtle ways:
- Writing (Al-Kitabah): Writing negative comments on social media. Al-Ghazali said: “The pen is one of two tongues.”
- Body Language: Winking, sneering, or pointing with the hand to belittle someone.
- Imitation (Al-Muhakah): Imitating someone’s manner of walking if they are lame, or their way of speaking. Aisyah Radhiyallahu ‘anha once imitated someone’s manner, then the Prophet ﷺ reprimanded her:مَا يَسُرُّنِي أَنِّي حَاكَيْتُ إِنْسَانًا وَلِي كَذَا وَكَذَا“I do not like imitating the manner of others, even if I were given the entire world.”
- Ghibah in the Style of a Religious Scholar: For example, saying: “Alhamdulillah, Allah has protected us, unlike Fulan who has been afflicted with calamity.” The statement is a prayer, but the intention is to belittle. This combines three sins: Ghibah, Riya’, and Ujub (feeling of self-righteousness).
The Dangers of Backbiting and Its Negative Impacts
The negative impact of ghibah not only damages social relationships, but destroys our “account” in the afterlife.
- Spiritual Bankruptcy (Muflis): On the Day of Judgement, the rewards of your prayers, fasts, and charity will be transferred to the person you backbit about.
- Taking on the Sins of Others: If your good deeds are exhausted, the sins of those you backbite will be placed upon you.
- Sin More Severe Than Riba: In a hadith narrated by Anas bin Malik Radhiyallahu ‘anhu it is mentioned:وَأَرْبَى الرِّبَا عِرْضُ الْمُسْلِمِ“And the worst of riba is violating the honor of a Muslim.”
How to Avoid Backbiting?
Imam Al-Ghazali provided a recipe for soul therapy as a way to avoid the behavior of backbiting:
1. Realize That You Are “Transferring Rewards”
Whenever you want to talk about someone’s flaws, ask yourself: “Would I be willing for the reward of my prayers today to be taken by him/her?”
Hasan al-Basri May Allah have mercy on him was once informed that someone was backbiting about him. He instead sent a gift of dates to that person and said: “You have gifted your good deeds to me, so I want to reciprocate.”
2. Busy with One’s Own Faults
No human is perfect. The most effective way to avoid gossip is self-reflection. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
طُوبَى لِمَنْ شَغَلَهُ عَيْبُهُ عَنْ عُيُوبِ النَّاسِ
“Fortunate is the one who is preoccupied with their own faults to the point of forgetting to concern themselves with the faults of others.”
3. Remember, to ridicule physical appearance is to ridicule the Creator.
If you insult someone’s physical appearance (e.g., “He/She is ugly”), you are actually insulting Allah who created them. A wise person said: “This face is not of my making, so I cannot improve it. To criticize it is to criticize the One who made it.”
4. If Angry, Restrain Yourself
Al-Ghazali mentioned one of the causes of backbiting is to vent anger (tasyfi al-ghaizh). The cure for it is to restrain anger for the sake of Allah.
5. Reprove or Abandon (For the Listener)
If you are in a gossiping environment, the law of ghibah also applies to the listener who remains silent and enjoys it.
In the story of Abu Bakar and Umar May Allah be pleased with them, the Prophet ﷺ once said to both of them (even though only one was speaking):
إِنَّكُمَا أَكَلْتُمَا مِنْ لَحْمِ أَخِيكُمَا
“Indeed, you two have consumed the flesh of your brother.”
Therefore, leave the gathering of backbiting if you are unable to rebuke it.
How to Repent from Backbiting and Its Expiatory Prayer
Ghibah (backbiting) is a complex sin because it involves two rights at once: The right of Allah (Haqqullah) and the right of humans (Haqqul Adami). Therefore, the way to repent is not simply enough by crying on the prayer rug.
Imam Al-Ghazali in Ihya’ ‘Ulumuddin explains the stages of repentance from backbiting as follows:
1. Regret and Repentance (Rights of Allah)
The first step is to regret the act (Nadam) and resolve not to repeat it to expiate the sin before Allah.
2. Seeking Forgiveness Directly/Forgiveness (Adami Rights)
This is the most difficult condition. Al-Ghazali affirmed that the perpetrator of ghibah is obligated to visit the person who was backbit about to seek forgiveness (Istihlal).
ثُمَّ يَسْتَحِلُّ الْمُغْتَابَ لِيُحِلَّهُ فَيَخْرُجُ مِنْ مَظْلَمَتِهِ
“Then he asks for forgiveness from the person who was backbit about, so that person may pardon him, thus removing him from wrongdoing.”
However, Al-Ghazali gave an important note about the etiquette of apologizing. Do not apologize merely for show or to be considered a pious and humble person (Riya’), while the heart does not truly regret it.
وَيَنْبَغِي أَنْ يَسْتَحِلَّهُ وَهُوَ حَزِينٌ مُتَأَسِّفٌ نَادِمٌ عَلَى فِعْلِهِ
“And he should seek forgiveness while in a state of sadness, regret, and sorrow over his actions.”
How to Ask for Forgiveness?
Imam Al-Ghazali quoted the words of Atha’ bin Abi Rabah regarding how to confess the sin of ghibah (backbiting) to the victim:
أَنْ تَمْشِيَ إِلَى صَاحِبِكَ فَتَقُولَ لَهُ: كَذَبْتُ فِيمَا قُلْتُ وَظَلَمْتُكَ وَأَسَأْتُ, فَإِنْ شِئْتَ أَخَذْتَ بِحَقِّكَ وَإِنْ شِئْتَ عَفَوْتَ
“You come to your friend and say to him: ‘I have lied in what I said, I have wronged you, and I have done evil. So if you wish, take your right (retaliate), and if you wish, forgive.’“
This opinion is strengthened by the Sahih Hadith of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ:
مَنْ كَانَتْ لِأَخِيهِ عِنْدَهُ مَظْلَمَةٌ فِي عِرْضٍ أَوْ مَالٍ فَلْيَسْتَحِلَّهَا مِنْهُ مِنْ قَبْلِ أَنْ يَأْتِيَ يَوْمٌ لَيْسَ هُنَاكَ دِينَارٌ وَلَا دِرْهَمٌ
“Whoever has wronged his brother in honor (backbiting) or property, let him seek his forgiveness today before a day comes when there will be no Dinar and Dirham.” (Sahih Bukhari)
3. If Unable to Meet (The Person Dies/Is Missing)
Then, what if the person we are gossiping about has passed away, moved house and lost contact, or if telling them would actually cause greater bloodshed/enmity?
Imam Al-Ghazali offered a solution:
فَإِنْ كَانَ غَائِبًا أَوْ مَيِّتًا فَيَنْبَغِي أَنْ يُكْثِرَ لَهُ الِاسْتِغْفَارَ وَالدُّعَاءَ وَيُكْثِرَ مِنَ الْحَسَنَاتِ
“If the person is absent (unavailable) or has died, then one should increase in seeking forgiveness (asking for forgiveness) for them, pray for them, and increase in good deeds.”
The Prayer of Expiation for Backbiting (Seeking Forgiveness for the Victim)
There is an opinion from Al-Hasan Al-Basri stating that it is sufficient to seek forgiveness without needing to inform the person (if the harm is significant), based on a hadith narrated by Anas bin Malik May Allah be pleased with him:
كَفَّارَةُ مَنِ اغْتَبْتَهُ أَنْ تَسْتَغْفِرَ لَهُ
“The expiation (atonement) for backbiting someone is to seek forgiveness (Istighfar) for them.”
Therefore, the prayer that can be read whenever one remembers committing the sin of backbiting about someone is:
اللَّهُمَّ اغْفِرْ لَنَا وَلَهُ
Allahummaghfir lanaa wa lahu “O Allah, forgive us and him.”
According to Mujahid, expiating for the sin of consuming the flesh of a brother (backbiting) is by praising him (mentioning his good qualities) in the places where you previously slandered him, and by praying for goodness for him.
FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions About Ghibah)
Is recounting the injustice of others considered backbiting?
There are several exceptions to backbiting (ghibah) that are permitted in Islamic law, one of which is *Tazhallum* (the wronged person reporting to a judge/authority). However, only state the necessary facts according to the legal reality, do not add emotional embellishment.
What if we talk about people without mentioning their names?
If the listener **understands** who is being referred to (even if the name is disguised with initials or characteristics), it is still ghibah. Al-Ghazali affirmed: *”What is forbidden is to make [others] understand (at-tafhim).”*
What is the ruling on backbiting on social media?
Equally forbidden, even potentially more dangerous. Verbal backbiting disappears with the wind, but written backbiting on the internet is permanent and can be read by thousands of people. The sin becomes a continuous sin that continues to flow.
Closing
Ghibah (backbiting) is a subtle yet deadly disease of the heart. It is often disguised in casual conversation, jokes, and even religious discussions. By understanding the meaning of ghibah is consuming carrion and contemplating the evidence prohibiting ghibah, may we be more vigilant.
Let’s replace the habit of talking about others with praying for them. Remember Al-Ghazali’s advice: the cure for backbiting is faith and knowledge. May Allah protect our tongues.
Reference
Al-Ghazali, Abu Hamid Muhammad bin Muhammad. Iḥyā’ ‘Ulūm ad-Dīn. Beirut: Dar al-Ma’rifah, no date.
